Backseat drivers are one of life's great mysteries. They do not mean to be annoying. They really do not. But something happens the moment they sit in a passenger seat. A switch flips. A new personality emerges. And suddenly they are transformed into a commentator, an instructor, a safety inspector, and a mild tornado of dramatic sighs.

We have all ridden with one. Some of us secretly are one. And none of us want to admit it.

Let us start with the most iconic backseat driver trait. The invisible brake pedal. Every true backseat driver has one. You could be driving at a calm and comfortable speed, but the moment another car appears two streets away, they press their foot into the floor like they are trying to stop the vehicle by sheer force of will. It never works, obviously, but that does not matter. What matters is that they tried.

Then there is the sound. Not quite words, not quite a gasp, just something between an inhale and a squeak. The universal backseat alarm call. They swear they are not doing it, but everyone else in the car hears it loud and clear.

A close second is the running commentary. They will tell you that you can turn left after you have already turned left. They will point out a parked car you already saw. They will warn you about a speed bump that you are literally driving over at that exact moment. It is not that they think you are a bad driver. They simply believe they have a magical gift for noticing things one second after you do.

Music is another battlefield. Put on a playlist and watch their face. Too loud. Too quiet. Too happy. Too sad. Too modern. Too old. They do not dislike your music. They just feel responsible for curating the soundtrack of the journey. That is the burden they carry.

Then there is the dramatic lean. When you take a turn, they lean their entire body as if shifting their weight will somehow help you. The car is not a canoe, but they lean anyway. It is instinct. You cannot train it out of them.

Let us talk about mirror checking. Backseat drivers check every mirror, even though they have absolutely no control over the car. They stare at the side mirror. Then the rear mirror. Then the side mirror again. They are on high alert the entire time. It is like riding with a hawk that has taken a few defensive driving courses.

But here is the thing most people forget. Backseat drivers are not bad people. They do not set out to stress the driver. If anything, their strange mix of behaviours usually comes from a place of caring. They want everyone to get home safe. They love driving so much that being a passenger feels wrong. They are wired to assess, comment, and micro manage every mile.

Many backseat drivers are actually the main driver in their household. When they are not holding the wheel, they feel like they have lost a limb. Their brain cannot accept it. Their instincts go into overdrive. Suddenly they are checking speeds, angles, distances, potholes, and anything else the human eye can possibly spot through a windscreen.

There are also the nervous ones. They had one bad experience years ago. Maybe a close call. Maybe a minor bump. Maybe a scary moment on a roundabout. And ever since, their brain has become a backup warning system. Loud, but well meaning.

The best way to handle a backseat driver is not to argue. That only makes them more alert. Instead, distract them. Ask a question. Tell a story. Hand them a snack. Anything that shifts their brain from street patrol to something more peaceful. You will know it has worked when they stop checking mirrors like a meerkat scanning for predators.

Of course, the best cure is to simply hand them the keys next time. Let them drive. Watch the transformation. They go silent. Calm. Focused. Happy. Suddenly all is well in the world. The steering wheel is back where they believe it belongs.

And if you are reading this and thinking none of this applies to you, then I have some news. You might be the backseat driver. The signs are subtle, but they are there. The sigh. The lean. The sound that is not quite a gasp. The tiny twitch when someone brakes later than you would. Own it. Accept it. It is who you are.

Backseat drivers are not a problem. They are part of the rich tapestry of British motoring. They give us stories, laughs, and sometimes unnecessary advice at roundabouts.

And honestly, every driver has a little backseat driver inside them. Even the calmest ones. Even the ones who deny it. Driving brings out strange instincts. That is part of the fun. Part of the stress. Part of the adventure.

So here is to the backseat drivers of the world. The unofficial co pilots. The self appointed safety officers. The humans who care so much that they forget to relax. We tease them, but journeys would be a lot less entertaining without them.